It seems like in some other circumstances this would be more of a confession. Perhaps if I were more devout in my monthly beliefs, if I took each to be exclusive in its control of my thoughts and feelings, then this may feel a bit more like coming out. But such is not the case, so I don’t feel that bad.

You see, I haven’t been sticking to my readings for the last few months. Instead I have been quickly (quick for me, anyway, which ain’t that quick) working my way through the latest and most popular atheist authors in addition to my religious readings. I’ve finished Richard Dawkins’ The God Delusion, and Christopher Hitchens’ god is not Great: How Religion Poisons Everything and now I’m reading Dan Dennett’s Breaking the Spell: Religion as a Natural Phenomenon.

It seems kind of strange that I would be trying to maintain positions that seem both for and against religion. Luckily this is not the case. As I study these religions, month by month, my interest in my own personal beliefs has escalated. I’ve never been really against religion per se, but these books are a good way of getting a look at religion from the outside, which oddly enough is something I think I’ve been missing. I’ve spent so much time trying to wrap my head around new ideas that I’ve forgotten where I’m coming from, so it’s good to get back to my roots.

When (perhaps I should rather say ‘if’, this place is looking pretty bare these days) I’m finally at the end of this year, looking back on the twelve months and the twelve faiths that I tried to practice and study, I doubt I will find myself wholly converted to one of these ideas. In fact, I kind of hope I don’t. I’ve never been satisfied with one school of thought or another.

So anyway, don’t get me wrong. I am genuinely trying to experience each of these religions, but my personal beliefs have not changed. In fact, they’re growing by leaps and bounds.